The Secret Feminazi Agenda, REVEALED

As a member of the secret feminazi society, I have had access to all of the feminazi documents. I know of their strategies, their plans, and of their workings.

Well, today I was notified that there has been a security breech. Someone has discovered that we feminists (who are all women) are going to use male feminists (silly men, how can they be FEMINISTS?) to breed and be shark food.

I am here to confirm that yes, we will be feeding the men to the sharks. However, the person who had cracked our encryption has gotten some details wrong. I plan to correct those mistakes, and give you the ACTUAL agenda of the feminazi conspiracy.

First off: we’re not going to have men slaughter one another. That’s barbaric. Instead, we’re planning to genetically modify kitties and puppies to make them into KittySharks and PuppySharks. And we’ll send THOSE out to kill men, by seeing if people pet them or not. If people pet them and go “d’aww”, then they will be saved. If not, BOOM. KittyShark and PuppyShark, ATTACK!

Second of all, we do plan on having men around to breed with. However, it will only be a select number of men, who will make up the alpha cock carousel. We will also be jacking their sperm after every ride. Said sperm will then be used to impregnate ourselves, so that we can entrap them into paying us money forever. The vast majority of men will be castrated and made into slaves for our delight, making BBQ ribs and fixing our computers and stuff.

Third, we’re not only using sharks. For the landlocked countries, we plan to use bears, and for many countries with no access to salt water, crocodiles and various felines.

Fourth, we’re only going to feed them three things:

  1. Severed penises, after we remove the foreskins to make our beauty creams.
  2. People who don’t pet our KittySharks or PuppySharks.
  3. Old men. Old men can all go be eaten, we’re not going to expend our energy to assist them when we could be jacking sperm and riding the alpha cock carousel. 

Finally, and fifth, all men and boys will be raised under the FEMINAZI curriculum, so that they will be brainwashed and be feminized into serving us.

Now that you know what we plan to do, prepare yourselves. We’re coming for you.

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In case this wasn’t obvious. this is a joke. Enjoy.

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